Opening Group Routine – Contemporary: “Dimmon Kryper Sakta In” by District 73; choreo by Sonya Tayeh and Dmitri Chaplin
Kate: Sorry but… I didn’t really watch this part.
Erica: I had trouble with this because the cameras were SO SWOOPY and I couldn’t really get a sense of what was going on. I think I was also in a very snarky, cynical mood last night and liked almost nothing.
Kate: I HATE her hair, and I HATE her earrings – they make her look like she has no neck.
Erica: Why is her hair ever up? Her hair is so pretty!
Kate: And…I can’t even put into words how much I hate that dark shade of lipstick. It doesn’t look good on anyone.
Erica: The whole make-up look sort of clashed with the dress.
Kate: I do love the dress color and material, but it’s an awkward length and probably more appropriate for going to a wedding than hosting a reality competition show.
Erica: Yeah, I wanted to like the dress more than I actually did.
Kate: Curtis is injured? Oh he’s out.
Kate: I’m angry but not surprised that Makenzie is in the bottom for the third week in a row. We all know Alexis is going home.
Erica: Yup. I continue not being surprised by Makenzie’s place in the bottom, not because she’s not good, because she’s spectacular, but because she doesn’t inspire any empathy. She’s too pretty, too sexy, too talented, too inaccessible despite pretending to have a crush on Paul. There’s no struggle there, so there’s no story and nothing to root for.
Alexis’s Solo: “Stand By Me” by Ben E. King
Kate: She has absolutely zero energy! What is she doing?!
Erica: I don’t know. She knows she’s done.
Jasmine’s Solo: “Endangered Species” by Diana Reeves
Kate: She really shouldn’t be in the bottom. But her hair looks much better like that!
Erica: She’s really, really pretty. I think I only began noticing this week.
Jenna & Tucker – Hip-hop: “Slight Work” by Wale feat. Big Sean; choreo by Luther Brown
Kate: Well…She tried.
Erica: This was laughably awful on all levels.
Kate: He has absolutely no hip-hop in him. His moves were way too pretty, despite giving a good effort on the hip-hop “personality”.
Erica: I have more swag than both of them.
Kate: There were also too many awkward non-choreography breaks, but I blame Luther for that.
Erica: Yeah, normally I like him very much but this was a bad song and bad choreography; there was too little for them to do.
Kate: HAH – did you see Anna Kendrick roll her eyes at Nigel!? (I LOVE that she is this week’s guest judge, by the way!)
Erica: OMG I need to fangirl swoon about Anna Kendrick a little. I mean, I love Pitch Perfect, obviously, but I’ve loved her since Camp. And now she’s going to be in Into the Woods, which is in my top five favorite musicals, maybe in my top three, although I’m nervous about the movie. The IMDB plot description right now reads, “A witch conspires to teach important lessons to various characters of popular children’s’ stories” and that’s not exactly what the stage musical is about and if that’s what the movie’s going to be about, it’s going to be worse than the musical by a lot. But she’s also going to be in the movie of The Last Five Years which I’ve only ever heard, not seen, but I LOVE it and it makes me sob uncontrollably and I can’t wait. Okay, I’m done.
Alexis & Nico – Contemporary: “Ashes” by The Bengsons; choreo by Sonya Tayeh
Kate: It’s not really fair that she got contemporary when she is in danger of going home because with contemporary you don’t have to do too much difficult choreography to actually look good. You know?
Erica: I still think she looks only okay, not great, and the performance was over-the-top. But that was also the choreo, which I thought was way too literal and obvious and annoying. I haven’t disliked a Sonja Tayeh routine in a long time, but I didn’t like this.
Kate: But…He is EXTREMELY talented. I’d like to see him and Tucker dance together, actually.
Erica: Yeah. I do like him quite a bit more than I like her.
Hayley & Not-Curtis – Argentinian Tango: “Este Es El Rey” by Juan D’Arienzo; choreo by Leonardo & Miriam
Kate: Some more unfairness is going on here, because she got to dance with THE CHOREOGRAPHER!
Erica: Yeah…But she still had to work.
Kate: Unfairness aside, she was phenomenal. She had the perfect pace and gave very effective dramatic pauses. She might be giving Makenzie a run for her money.
Erica: I actually thought this was slightly less good than her samba, but she really hit it. But she’s still my favorite girl.
Makenzie & Paul – Jazz: “You’ll Find A Way” by Santigold; choreo by Sonya Tayeh
Kate: Paul kind of looks like a Latin Joseph Gordon Levitt?
Erica: TOTALLY! Thank you.
Kate: Well he keeps getting better and better week over week. And, man can she point a toe!
Erica: And be sexy.
Kate: They both had great body rolls throughout.
Jasmine & Aaron – Contemporary: “The District Sleeps Alone Tonight” by Birdy; choreo by Justin Giles
Kate: Oh no! The Giving Tree always makes you cry!
Erica: No, no, no, I’m GLAD we’re bringing to light what an F’ED UP book that is.
Kate: I thought this was good but too literal. I honestly feel choreographers and dancers should be able to show us “giving tree” without her dressed in green and holding an apple.
Erica: Well, in a night of lots of literalness, this didn’t bother me so much, because the apple was doing something, although that dress kind of looked awful on her beautiful self.
Kate: Also, he looks like a guido from our high school straight out of 2003 in those awful capris.
Erica: He kind of always does.
Kate: Oh good, another lesson from Nigel!
Erica: Seriously. Nigel. Every child in the English-speaking world knows the damn story. Also, it’s about unconditional love but it’s also about EXTREME CO-DEPENDENCY and illness and I thought the dance actually showed that pretty well. Not perfectly, but pretty well.
Amy & Fik-Shun – Hip-hop: “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye; choreo by Chris Scott
Kate: Oh man, I can’t believe she fell. But I can believe it because I just KNEW something bad would happen when he poured too much water from the pitcher onto the table which then got onto the check portfolio thing which then dripped onto the chairs/floor.
Kate: Anyway, I feel like this is exactly something actual Fik-Shun would do to actual Amy in real life.
Erica: They are all adorable, all the time.
Kate: And I don’t like how Nigel said he’s sick of them playing the same characters – that’s not their fault at all! Mr. Scott, and other choreographers, should know they can do much more with them in terms of characters.
Erica: Also, SYTYCD, please chyron your choreographers. And give them some space on your web page. I know you don’t want to acknowledge the paid professionals that make your otherwise cheap-to-produce reality show a hit, because then you might have to pay them, like, more, but seriously. Make this the tiniest bit easier for us.
Kate: They used to do it though, I don’t know why they stopped and replaced them with hashtags. #Socialmediaistakingover
Kate: She is better at hip-hop than Latin ballroom.
Erica: Yeah. But honestly, she didn’t do too badly here.
Kate: I’m sorry but she looked way too awkward and shaky and uncomfortable shimmying and swaying her hips.
Erica: Yes, she can’t do sexy very well. Last year, I said that Witney struck me as someone who didn’t really feel “sexy” but could perform “sexy” like a very, very good mimic. Malece also gave off the feel of a mimic, but she’s not as good at it as Witney. But she can do lifts and stuff.
Kate: He continues to completely creep me out.
Mini Group #1 (Makenzie, Alan, Nico, Hayley, Malece, Jenna, Not-Curtis) – Broadway: “Come Together” by Joe Cocker (Across the Universe soundtrack); choreo by Spencer Liff
Kate: This is not a song I picture hearing at bar and wanting to break into dance, but the dance was awesome.
Erica: I was trying to remember if Across the Universe came to Broadway, and if not, why do we keep choreographing Broadway dances to non-Broadway tunes when there are so many good ones? But yeah, I thought the dance was fantastic.
Kate: I loveeee the costumes and hair. But it doesn’t seem fair (that seems to be my theme today) that all the best girls were in one routine?
Erica: I think I like Jasmine more than I like either Hayley or Jenna. And Amy is probably better than all of them.
Mini Group #2 (Alexis, Fik-Shun, Tucker, Amy, Aaron, Jasmine, Paul) – Contemporary: “Tears of an Angel” by Ryandan; choreo by Bonnie Story
Kate: I’m so tired of hearing about this topic, as if bullying was just invented this decade.
Erica: I thought she said “bowling” at first. I’m like, we’re going to have a traumatic routine about . . . bowling? But yeah, I don’t like the way the word, which is really so general, gets flown around, context-free, and so self-righteously. “I’m against bullying. And mean people. And frowns. But I love nice people and puppies and rainbows!” Well, good for you, sugar.
Kate: It was a beautiful dance without the “social conscience” crap. And excuse me Miss New Choreographer, just because I personally specifically don’t actively prevent bullying, I am part of the problem? I don’t think so. What a loony tune.
Erica: Well…Yeah, if you see bullying happening around you, and you don’t do anything, you are kind of part of the problem. I mean, no one expects you to don a cape and go flying through the night, rooting out bullies in their lairs, but one of the things that one can say about “bullying” that is actually useful is that when there are social consequences for the bully, rather than social rewards, bullies tend to bully less. So be someone who makes consequences for the bully or at least does not reward them. But I still agree that the choreographer was a loony tune.
Kate: But she made it seem like even if I don’t see it going on around me but I still do nothing about it I am part of the problem. I’m twenty-freaking-five years old, I don’t see bullying!!
Kate: Wow, that was more quick and to the point than usual.
Erica: Love it. Want that level of conversation all the time. “You two? Gone.” No more of this, “Let me talk to each of you individually and then do the ‘if you stay’ routine when you already know if that person is going to stay!”
Kate: Totally! But we are not surprised by the judges’ decisions one bit.
Kate: I know they have a new baby and all, but next we can we get at least ONE NappyTabs routine!?
Erica: Maybe they could use the baby as a prop!