Group Routine – Jazz, choreo by Mandy Moore
[“Take Me To The River” by Annie Lennox]
Erica: The minute I saw “Annie Lennox,” I thought, “Sonya Tayeh”. Then I thought, “Wait, no, it’s gotta be Mandy Moore. She’s all about the ‘80s”.
Kate: I love Annie Lennox songs on this show. (Ah, what a perfect place to provide a link to Ashley and Mark’s season 7 dance to ”Wonderful”!)
Erica: I was sad that they got rid of the swoopy scarves so early. I like swoopy scarves.
Kate: I was sad that the girls weren’t together at all.
Erica: I gotta say, they looked pretty professional for this number. Way better, more energetic and together than last week’s hip-hop. Even though I liked last week’s bizarre concept and costuming and stuff.
Kate: Yes, but I didn’t think the girls were that strong together. The partner stuff was cool, and they looked great at the end. Can we talk about the dumb/weird little choreo things they now do during introductions?
Erica: No, I skip them or go get a Coke or something.
Kate: I’m not a fan. They always look awkward. Who drinks Coke anymore?
Erica: Ew feh.
Kate: You know I didn’t realize “feh” was a Yiddish word until a couple weeks ago?
Erica: I didn’t realize “klutz” was until very recently.
Kate: Me too! Anyway, it is now July. This is a very January outfit. (Except for the fact that mock turtlenecks are a never outfit.)
Erica: Her hair is great, although my preference is for last week’s hair, and makeup is A-OK with me. But I don’t dig the dress. Maybe it’s a personal thing.
Kate: No, it’s a mock turtleneck thing.
Erica: Is Mary, like, on purpose trying to look old?
Kate: Oh, I like her outfit. Hah. I find myself liking old lady clothes more and more these days.
Erica: Misty again? Is this to honor Misty or because people are tired of guest judging for this thing?
Kate: I heard she’s permanent now!
Erica: So no more guests?
Kate: This I do not know.
Valerie & Ricky – Bollywood, choreo by Nakul Dev Mahajan
[“Dilliwaali Girlfriend” from the Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani Soundtrack]
Erica: VALERIE IN THE CHESHIRE CAT COSTUME I CAN’T EVEN THERE IS TOO MUCH CUTE.
Kate: This is when I don’t pay attention.
Erica: Oh, and of course she doesn’t know how to be sexy because of f*cking course.
Kate: So Ricky was fabU here, duh. Valerie had great energy as usual, and decent form/technique, but was nowhere near sharp or quick enough for this style. Not surprising, but disappointing because I want her to be good.
Erica: You know what, she really doesn’t know how to be sexy. And yeah, great energy from both of them but she was not precise enough. I loved her costume, though. When Nigel said that Bollywood reminds him of something, I thought he was going to say, “When England owned everything”, but he didn’t. He had Misty to back up this idea that Nigel basically introduced Bollywood to the Western world.
Kate: Didn’t he?
Bridget & Emilio – Contemporary, choreo by Travis Wall
[“The Leaving Song” by Chris Garneau]
Erica: I like her. I don’t want her to go home.
Kate: Me too. Me either.
Erica: So I’m watching this on my iPad so that I can type on my computer at the same time and, boy, the lighting was not okay for me here. But I can see well enough to know they can’t send her home, right?
Kate: I kept thinking, “Where’s the actual bed? They’ve used actual beds on the show before, what gives?”
Erica: Kate, it was like, symbolic and stuff.
Kate: Ah. Symbols. This was very good.
Erica: I really liked it. I really, really liked it. I mean, it was pretty literal in terms of the interpretation of Travis’s stated ideas, but I don’t mind that and I thought they — especially her — did a pretty fantastic job of it.
Kate: Agreed, very strong. She has crazy (in a good way) legs. I think she’s my favorite right now?
Erica: Well, if I say she’s mine, she’ll be cut tonight so I’ll shut up.
Tanisha & Rudy – Hip-hop, choreo by Dave Scott
[“Good Kisser” by Usher]
Erica: Rudy’s faces in his first performance are killing me.
Kate: In what way?
Erica: OMG SO CUTE. He’s, like, 11? And he’s doing salsa and he is pulling SO MANY FACES. Hey it turns out the brightness on my iPad was way down. I fixed it.
Kate: I CAN SEE 30% OF HER TUSH! IN-A-PPROPES!
Erica: So I thought she was very good at the non-hip-hoppy moves. Her legs and hips are very fluid. And I liked the concept and the costumes and all. But the whole thing didn’t really gel for me.
Kate: See, I unfortunately really enjoyed this. I say unfortunately because I don’t want to like Tanisha, but in this I did. A lot.
Erica: I don’t know if it was the choreo but I honestly don’t think it was. It just kind of felt like they weren’t in the same dance.
Kate: See I thought the choreo did get a little repetitive towards the end (like, enough hip shakes) and was overall corny, but I still liked it a lot. What is happening to my brain?
Erica: Maybe I’m just too old to find any of these kids sexy. But I am enjoying Cat dishing.
Kate: P.S. There’s a Chris Scott hip-hop choreographer and now a Dave Scott hip-hop choreographer. Will wonders ever cease?
Erica: Chris Scott is the skinny white one. I like him. I like Dave, too.
Jessica & Marcquet – Foxtrot, choreo by Dmitry Chaplin
[“I Put a Spell on You” by Nina Simone]
Erica: I think I’m hitting my lifetime limit on this song.
Kate: What about the Hocus Pocus version?
Erica: I mean, Bette will always be Bette but I’m just tired of it. It’s not a bad song or anything, I just see it come up and go, ugh.
Kate: How about Tab Benoit’s? He is very sexy.
Erica: I don’t know who that is. Isn’t this a little fluid for a foxtrot? And, like, sexy, with their pelvises against each other and all?
Kate: Yes, and isn’t she a bit too stripper-ish? Sorry, not trying to be catty, but she was way too much here. Too much.
Erica: So Marcquet is totes going home.
Kate: Shame, he’s good.
Erica: I LOVE it (in a totally non-sarcastic way) when Nigel actually criticizes the choreography. Also I need to learn to do that cat’s eye thing like on Jessica’s eyes right now.
Kate: You’re the one who taught me how to do eye makeup, I’m sure you could figure out the subtle cat eye.
Erica: It’s hard; it works best with a liquid liner, which is hard to control. And I’m out of practice at makeup in general.
Kate: Use the liquid liner Mom and I use from Lancome. Great stuff. (Lancome did not sponsor this post in any way). So this dance sucked, next?
Erica: Okay, buy me some. Also, Lancome, if you’d like to sponsor a post, we’d totes take your money. I really like your eye makeup remover!
Kate: Sephora’s house brand makeup remover is actually better. (Sephora is not a sponsor of this post either, but we’d take it.)
Erica: Oh, I have the Sephora one! I’m taking it with me this weekend! (To my sister-in-law’s wedding in San Francisco, if you’re curious.) BTW, readers, we are both doing this recap in real time and we’re in a commercial break right now. That’s why the long chat about makeup. Also someone stole my Diet Coke. Damn it.
Carly & Serge – Contemporary, choreo by Mandy Moore
[“Foolish Games” by Jewel]
Erica: What’s in the water over there? Everyone’s sexing it up this week.
Kate: You toooooook your coat off, and stood in the rain. You were always craaazy like that. Er, this song is soooo your high school years!
Erica: 🙂 Zoe likes this song.
Kate: So does Aunt Kate!
Erica: It’s giving me flashbacks to adolescence.
Kate: Yikes. Hey, this dance was great, and one move in particular reminded me a lot of Robert Roldan and Allison Holker’s “Fix You” routine from season 7 (which I think is my favorite season ever?) — let’s watch that one now!
Erica: This was a lot less of a literal interpretation of the theme but beautifully danced. I just caught sight of Cat’s shoes. They kind of make me like the rest of the outfit more.
Kate: She lucked out with another good routine, and I like her despite not wanting to, similar to how I feel about Tanisha. This was very good.
Erica: I don’t like her personality much but I think she’s a fine dancer. And I like Serge quite a bit. Maybe because he’s not 12.
Kate: Yes, he’s very good. And I loved his first-ever ballroom competition outfit. And right, doesn’t Carly’s personality just irritate the crap out of you?
Emily & Teddy – Salsa, choreo by Oksana & Jonathan
[“Bruk It Down (Soca Remix)” by Mr. Vegas feat. Alison Hinds]
Erica: I couldn’t remember who these people were, but now I’ll remember that Teddy is freakin’ adorable as a kid. And Oksana is like some sort of living Russian stereotype.
Kate: What else do you expect with that name? They are my least favorite dancers (skill-wise, not personality-wise). I totes noticed Emily’s slip and contrary to what Misty said, I think it did mess her up for the rest of the performance because she slowed down and hesitated from there on out and just looked to nervous to do it full out.
Erica: She looked super awkward. Her hips did not look like salsa dancing hips.
Kate: And his hips are just CREEPY. Bleh.
Erica: Isn’t that what male salsa hips are supposed to look like?
Kate: I guess, but he looks so creepy doing it. Me no likey.
Erica: Misty’s voice is starting to make me kind of nuts. Still appreciate her commentary. Oh, wait, Emily’s dancing injured? I hate that. I’m too much of a nervous Jewish mother.
Kate: When Misty was commenting on Teddy her words said “I love you” but her tone said “I think you suck but I’m paid to be somewhat nice”.
Jacque & Zack – Jazz, choreo by Sonya Tayeh
[“Back to Black” by Beyonce feat. Andre 3000]
Kate: Of ALL the people to cover my girl Amy Winehouse, I would NOT want it to be Beyonce. I’m so over her.
Erica: Overkill? Damn, Sonya is being tough on Jacque.
Kate: What do you mean by “overkill”?
Erica: Your Beyonce hate. Her costume is f-ing bizarre.
Kate: I’m sorry I’m just over her! And YES, I thought the same thing about the costume. Not relevant to the routine/song/century.
Erica: You know what, though, Sonya was right. She is kind of relying on pretty. And Misty seems to agree.
Kate: I think she’s talented, but not the most talented. I was surprised at how they pulled off sexual attraction in this routine as I cannot see them together in real life, but I enjoyed their chemistry and thought this was overall great. Could have been more the choreography than the dancing, though?
Erica: Well, Sonya is a pretty amazing choreographer. Isn’t she the one dating Rudy?
Kate: Sonya? No. Jacque? Yes.
Erica: Sorry, that’s what I meant. Sometimes I forget the whole pronoun-antecedent agreement thing.
Brooklyn & Casey – choreo by Will “Wildabeast” Williams
[“Hustle Hard Remix” by Ace Hood feat. Rick Ross & Lil Wayne]
Erica: They’re pulling some pretty cute faces.
Kate: Oh my god, this was quite possibly the least hip-hop routine to ever grace the SYTYCD stage. Oh my god I gasped OUT LOUD, like, SEVERAL times during this, that’s how bad I thought it was.
Erica: No way. No way. I’m not saying it was super-swag or anything, but there have been some seriously non-hip-hop hip-hop routines on this show.
Kate: What drugs are you/the judges on right now? This was SO BAD! Her faces were painful to watch! There was no swag! No getting down! Gah!
Erica: Excuse me, Kate, but her faces were HILARIOUS to watch.
Kate: No, there were like “Oh, this is hard, ah, this is harder, ahhh I look crazy, eh what’s next? Oh!” No. No no no no no.
Erica: Like I said. Hilarious.
Kate: Also known as horrible.
Erica: Excuse the F out of me, Nigel, but hip-hop DOES in fact require technique and precision, you pretentious, condescending, “benign racism” racist old man. God.
Mini-Group Routine #1 – Jazz, choreo by Sonya Tayeh
[“So Broken (Live)” by Bjork]
Erica: So, yes, I’d prefer a group routine to solos. But can someone explain to me how this happened? Did they tell this group, like, last week, that they were in the bottom and then have them practice this? So when they bring them on stage and “reveal” it, they actually already know? Or did Sonya whip this up backstage like five seconds ago? Did all the dancers rehearse it and then just the six step into their “parts”? SO MANY QUESTIONS.
Kate: My guess is they knew the bottom 6 by, like, last Thursday, and the learned this in a couple of days. This was a first, right?
Erica: Yes, it’s a first. Wait, no, there are four couples here. I’m confused. I have the short-term memory of a fruit fly so I can’t even remember which of these people are actually in danger.
Kate: Yea, now I’m confused too. Off with their heads!
Erica: Again, I’m in favor of the idea. But they need to be clearer about the whole rules aspect of this thing. Maybe these are the bottom eight and they just didn’t tell them which of them were actually the bottom six?
Kate: My brain hurts trying to figure it out, but I think I liked this better than the first group routine. Tanisha did do very well tonight. Hmmm..
Erica: Wait a second. Marcquet isn’t there. He was in the bottom six, wasn’t he?
Kate: Brain. Hurts. Also, it’s only 9:38? Is there another routine still?
Erica: Maybe it’s two mini-group routines, irrespective of people in danger? That’s been done before, right? In Melanie and Sasha’s season?
Kate: By George, I think you’ve got it!
Erica: Anyway, I agree with the judges. I think Sonya might be my favorite. And yup, there’s a Travis routine coming. Wow, that could have been clearer.
Mini-Group Routine #2 – Contemporary, choreo by Travis Wall
[“Love Runs Out” by OneRepublic]
Erica: I love Travis’s brain. Sometimes he’s like, “It’s about a couple in love,” and I’m like, ugh, boring, but it usually isn’t. And then he comes up with some crazy amazing concepts and I just love him.
Kate: LOVE! Love this song, loved this routine. It had me dancing (on the couch). LOVE.
Erica: I think Ricky might be my favorite boy now. Also this was cool. Just cool. Good job, Travis. Good job, dancers. And good job, Cat’s hair, cascading down her back like that when she was at the bottom of the stairs.
Kate: And good job, girl I’m not sure who you were, with the full-down (that’s a cheerleading term)! Yea, Ricky is clearly the best on the show this season.
Erica: Do you think Sonya was looking at Travis like, “I’m going to put a knife in your neck at the wrap party”?
Kate: Ya, this totes shat on her mini-group routine. Sors Sonya.
Erica: Aw, man, hers was good, too! More group routines in general, that’s what I say!
Kate: Hear hear!
Erica: Nigel’s “Yeah, thanks, Cat” was totally sarcastic. Wait, four dancers next week? Why? Fox skimping on time for SYTYCD? Or is Nigel playing with us and they’re saving everyone this week?
Kate: Fox is way skimping. They give this who less and less time every season; I fear the day they finally — gasp — cancel.
Erica: Can you tell we’re doing this in real time? Okay, so it’s Marcquet and Brooklyn. Not surprised about Marcquet. Not even really that surprised about Brooklyn although I think she’s pretty good.
Kate: Me either. Happy with it. Moving on now, tune in next week for the top 14, after which we’ll skip over the top 12 and go right to the top 10, at which point the judges will have no say anymore whatsoever! Right?
Erica: I don’t know. I can’t keep up with the rules on this show. So this week, we are posting, like, right now. Next week might be late. I am getting home from San Francisco at some time I can’t remember when but I’m sure I won’t be able to get a post up before mid-day on Thursday.
Kate: Yes, so patience, young grasshoppers.